I have been
thinking about this post for several days. Yet, for some reason, it would not
come together … until today. Today it became personal & compelling … again
I heard
about a young lady who lost her job. Yes, twelve days before Christmas. The
reasons behind it are not the pressing matters for me. It is the true concern for the person, the
hurting and disappointed person - at a time of year that should be filled with
joy and happy memories. My heart was broken for her.
It made me
think – again – about the countless number of individuals who are not
experiencing ‘the most wonderful time of the year’. Whether it be the loss of a
job, the loss of a loved one, the sting of loneliness or the stress of
insufficient funds – this can be a very difficult time of the year. It can be a time filled with teary and sobbing nights.
In that post, I wrote [in part] about a situation, a conversation that I
was having with a close friend and:
“We were discussing how it
appeared that everything you prayed for as a new Christian got responded to
quickly and affirmatively but how that does not appear to be the case once you
have some years of walking in faith.
My best attempt to reconcile
this was to liken it to when my children were babies. I knew that they
were completely dependent upon me and unable to fend for themselves. They would
cry, and I would respond, quickly and affirmatively. I learned what the
different cries meant.
There was a cry that
meant ‘Change me’ and there was the cry that meant ‘Feed me’ and
the cry that meant ‘Burp me, please … I am about to explode!’ There
was the cry that said ‘I’m sleepy’ and, of course, there was the cry
that simply meant, ‘Please hold me ... I just need to know you are
near.’
They would cry and I would
respond. That was my job as a loving parent. However, there was also a point
where they had to use the language that I taught them and they would have to
verbalize what they needed/desired before they would receive. They had to grow
up.
It was a great discussion on
spiritual maturity. However, God always has something else in store. He
always keeps me balanced. Therefore, even as I talked about the need for
maturity as a Christian, He let me know that He is still that same loving parent
– despite the fact that He calls us to mature.”
In that post I went
on to describe a challenging situation which occurred:
“I received a terrible report
– one which sent me reeling and almost caused me to faint. However, the LORD
caught me and pulled me back to center, reminding me who He is and what He has
said. And He let me know that He cares for me so deeply. And
as I listened this week to a speaker online, that intense love that He has for
me captivated me.”
A ministry, which was a tremendous blessing to me during a very
faith-filled but challenging stretch of my journey, was having a conference. This
is what I wrote seven years ago in response to that message …
“… the guest speaker for
Wednesday was Sheryl Brady. It was powerful! She shared her heart
about the overwhelming love and presence of God. And something happened at the
50:58 mark of the video clip when she said these words … 'He even
understands what the tear meant that rolled down your face in the middle of the
night across the bridge of your nose onto your pillow … He hears and He knows.
He knows what you’re saying and He knows what you’re not saying…’
Those words arrested me
and reminded me that, even though He does require that I grow up and use the
language that He gave me, He understands when I cannot utter a word. He
knows my heart when I cannot form a word and all I can do is cry. He
speaks and understands 'cry', a fact that is powerful yet
not entirely surprising. We are made in His image after all. As a mom
I could understand the cries of my children because I am crafted in
the image of God who speaks and understands 'cry'.
Indeed, He knows the meaning
of every tear, every sob and every sigh. And when I weep, shedding
more tears that can be counted (by me), crying what becomes a flowing
stream or river, He sees each individual tear and can tell what each
one represents. Then He responds.”
I went on to reference the love of a parent … but how that pales in
comparison to the love of GOD.
“I
have a wonderful mom and God has privileged me with the awesome responsibility
of being a mom. However, more than that, I am thankful that I have a Father,
my Heavenly Father, who loves me and knows me and understands me even when
I revert to being a child.
-
He hears my cries and He
knows what each one means without me speaking a word
-
He knows the cry that
begs ‘Change me … I cannot change myself’
-
He translates the cry which
says ‘I am hungry for YOU … please feed me'
-
He understands the cry that
screams ‘I am about to explode!’
-
He knows that one tear
that says ‘I am so tired I don't know what to do’
-
He comprehends the river of
tears which whisper ‘I need You to hold me, to know that you are not only
near, but here.'
I love that about Him! And
today I want to encourage you. If all you can do is cry, if you wonder if He
sees that one solitary tear, when you ponder whether He knows what it means
... take confidence that He knows and He cares and He is attending to
every need.”
Fast forward to this week –
This past
Sunday, I went to church like I always do. And after church, I decided to go
spend some time with my mom. Now, anyone who has a parent with Alzheimer’s
knows that some days can be much better than others. Well, Sunday was not a
‘much better’ day. In fact, it was a ‘much worse’ day than any we have had in a
while. Her confusion was at an all-time high. Couple that with the fact that
she is currently in a facility that I have been trying to figure out a way to
get her out of since she arrived back in August … and it made for a very
challenging day for me.
After I kissed
her goodbye, I took that long walk to the front entrance/exit, pulled my jacket
closed and hurried through the rain, across the parking lot to my car. Once
inside – before I could even get the key in the ignition – I burst into tears.
It was as if a levee had broken. I could scarcely find words to speak but
somehow mustered up just enough strength to say, ‘God I know You’re still in
control … help me please.’
It took me back to that post I had
written all those years ago
And as I
drove home that rainy day, I kept telling myself, ‘He still speaks cry.’
Well this past Tuesday – He turned my
tears to joy
I received
an early Christmas present … a way out for my Mom!
He is such an amazing and faithful GOD!
AND –
While He
loves us all uniquely, the important fact is that HE LOVES US ALL
So, I will close by saying this:
If you cannot find the words, it is alright to cry. HE UNDERSTANDS ‘CRY’
If your eyes are misting just thinking about your issues, go right ahead and cry. HE
SPEAKS ‘CRY’
YOU CAN TRUST HIM WITH YOUR TEARS
He cares for that
which concerns you (I Peter 5:7) and He loved us all so much that He sent Jesus
to die for us (John 3:16). He
speaks every language under heaven and ...
He STILL speaks and
understands ‘CRY’.
Be
encouraged My Friend and know I am praying with you and for you …
Have a Blessed Evening!