Sounds like a ridiculous question doesn’t it? Who would ask such a thing? And if they had the audacity to make such an incredulous and insensitive inquiry, one would wonder why they would say ‘I do’ in the first place.
Imagine the scene …
It’s the big day. She has dreamed of this moment since the day she got her first doll-baby. He is so proud, and still a little dumbfounded, that she actually said ‘yes’. Everything was perfect. The lighting, flowers and music in the sanctuary were, well, heavenly. The reception, nothing like it! The décor, the food, the music, the dancing and, of course, the beautiful cake – it was like something out of a fairytale. All of the guests remarked that they were not sure they’d ever seen two people so in love.
They boarded the plane, reached their destination and entered the honeymoon suite. Naturally, he carried her across the threshold. Finally! The night they had waited for – and what a night it was. Yet, in the days (weeks and months) that followed, there was one pressing question. ‘I know I said, 'I do' but does that mean I have to stop dating?’
WHAT???!!!!
Now, to avoid the risk of offending my male or female readers, I won’t say who posed the question. It really doesn’t matter anyway. The real issue is how someone could do such a thing to someone they loved.
-- A pledge to love forever …
-- An agreement to be separate by nothing but death …
-- A gift, so precious and intimate - unmatched in value and unable to be returned or exchanged…
Unspeakable! How, after experiencing such a wonder, could one want to return to their old life? And not just return, but to actively engage in both lifestyles and expect their spouse to humbly accept such behavior.
Sounds like a crazy situation, doesn’t it?
Unfortunately, it is a true story – very sad, but true.
Some details may have been altered to protect certain parties.
‘They honored and worshiped God, but not exclusively ...They honored and worshiped God, but they also kept up their devotions to the old gods of the places they had come from.’ II Kings 17:33 (MSG)
This verse caught my attention as I tried to read yesterday and I couldn’t shake it off. It was a story thousands of years old. However, I can tell you that I know many people who are experiencing this very situation today – in their relationships with people and their relationship with God. Yet, if we can ever get the heavenly/spiritual relationship right the earthly relationships will follow suit.
When I read the verse in II Kings, I immediately questioned how someone could fear, revere and even worship the LORD AND serve other gods. I just could not get my mind around it. However, I knew it must be possible since He put it in His Word. And as I prayed for understanding, it became clearer.
You see, there are countless opportunities to be that partner who has committed themselves to what should be an eternal relationship - but who still goes outside of that relationship searching for fulfillment. It happens in the natural and it definitely happens in the spiritual. We become the bride of Christ – perhaps even enjoying a wonderful ‘ceremony’ and honeymoon phase and then the response is the same as our ill-fated couple, ‘I know I said ‘I do’ but does that mean I have to stop dating?’
Sometimes there is a draw to old experiences – an impure relationship with an old boyfriend or girlfriend, a drug addiction, an eating disorder. Do I have to give up the people and practices that have become so familiar and comfortable to me?
Sometimes there is the pull toward new gods of career, home, car or self. I’ve heard it said multiple times over and again …
• Just because I don’t pray doesn’t mean I don’t love God. He understands.
• I’m too busy working to go to church. That doesn’t mean God is not a priority.
• I love God … I just don’t believe in tithing.
The same mouth that praises God gossips and complains while boldly declaring, ‘God knows my heart!' We not only serve other gods but we go a step further and try to make God, The Holy & Righteous One into a kind of god that is comfortable to us.
Like the heartless spouse, there is the desire to be married (to experience the benefits of covenant relationship) – yet there is the urge to continue in behaviors and heart attitudes which reflect an individual who has never come into relationship with the One True and Living God. We allow worldly desires to pull us away from our One True Love.
The straying from covenant relationship does not result in a divided heart – it begins with a divided heart.
Therefore, let us put aside unholy actions, wanton gazes and selfish desires. ‘For all that is in the world – the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life – is not of the Father, but is of the world (I John 2:16).’ We must understand that, ‘those who are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with its affections and lusts (Gal. 5:24).’ They have said ‘I do’ to Christ – they have agreed to keep themselves only unto Him - not just until death, but into all eternity.
Yes, saying ‘I do’ does indeed mean we must stop dating.
'You shall love the Lord your God with all your [mind and] heart and with your entire being and with all your might.’
Deuteronomy 6:5 (AMP)
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