Good Afternoon Friends …
I pray your day has been great thus far. I am
already working on a four day weekend – I left work early today. What
a blessing!
And, as we
all get ready for Thanksgiving – and head
into weeks of holiday time – I wanted to take a couple of moments to talk about
GRACE.
WHAT ABOUT
GRACE?
Webster’s online dictionary has a number of
definitions for that word GRACE. However, this is the one that I would like to
focus on today:
: disposition to or
an act or instance of kindness, courtesy, or clemency
An
individual who is graceful would
possess this quality. They would
have a disposition [nature, character, temperament] towards kindness
[thoughtfulness, compassion, gentleness], courtesy [consideration, politeness,
civility] or clemency [MERCY & FORGIVENESS]
Grace is
important because we live in a world where pain is inevitable
In that post, I noted how “Inevitably, there will come a moment in
every relationship where someone will do something, or you will do something
that will cause a 'rift' in the relationship”
This season is
famous for those situations occurring as there are multiplied opportunities for
increased interactions with family, friends, used-to-be-friends, colleagues and
strangers.
But why are
there so many opportunities for things to go awry?
I believe it driven by two primary factors: ACTIONS and INTENTIONS
Our relationships
are shaped by actions and intentions.
And, our responses to others are based upon
our assessment of actions and intentions.
I was discussing this with a co-worker of
mine this week. She was sharing a situation where someone said something to her
that caused an occasion for offense. In listening to what she said, I
acknowledged the pain it likely inflicted. However, I also took the opportunity
to share my understanding of how it could happen so easily. And here it is:
WE OFTEN
JUDGE OURSELVES BY OUR INTENTIONS, AND OTHERS BY THEIR ACTIONS
We’ll pardon ourselves when we have offended
someone by reminding ourselves that we had the best intentions. Yet, we will
become hurt and irate with others based upon their actions – giving little or
no thought to the intentions behind their words or deeds. I then asked my co-worker
to think about our own friendship when she has said something to me that [while
well-intentioned] did not produce a great result. I reminded her that she
likely had the best of intentions – just like the person
who gave her cause to be offended.
HOWEVER –
There are times when the best of intentions
can still create the worst of outcomes
And wouldn’t you know it, two days after
talking to my friend, I had the exact same situation – only I was the cause of the offense. Best of intentions – worst outcome
And while I apologized swiftly – because I
would never want to be the cause for even a moment of discomfort in the life of
another person – it has to be understood that you cannot always repair the
damage which has been done.
As I thought about my own situation, my
thoughts gravitated toward Peter. You see Peter was famous in the area of
actions and intentions. He was bold, and passionate and impulsive, well-intentioned
but often missing the mark. That is probably why he is one of my favorite
disciples. I identify with him in many respects. Yet, despite his great intentions,
he often ended up with a horrible outcome.
HERE’S THE
THING –
Despite Peter’s well-intentioned declaration
of commitment to Christ (Mk. 14:29) and his bold actions in the garden of cutting
off a soldier’s ear (Jn. 18:10) to protect Jesus, it still resulted in his
ultimate denial of Christ (Jn. 18:15-27) –
the worst possible outcome ... especially
since his actions caused great pain to someone he loved deeply.
BUT GOD –
I am so thankful for all of the ‘But God …’
situations and circumstances in the Word and in life. What I love about being
in relationship with the LORD, though, is that the end is never the end.
You the LORD is the master of reconciliation.
And Jesus came and basically gave Peter a ‘do over’ and restored him to
fellowship. (John 21:15-25) That is what I love about Jesus!
JESUS
EXTENDED MERCY AND GRACE
YET WE –
You and I
are flawed and we may not always have the opportunity or the ability to set
things right. Therefore – take the opportunity in advance of acting or
reacting, speaking or responding to: SLOW
DOWN
To assist toward that end, I would like to
close by sharing two phrases that I try [not always successfully] to keep in
the forefront of my mind:
§ All truth is
good … but not all truth is good to
say
§ Just because
you can do a thing … it does not mean that you should
An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of
cure.
Better to avoid the occasions for offense
altogether than to try to repair them.
HOWEVER –
Should there be an offense, try to presume
the best intentions [and not the worst]
Should you be the offense [or cause of it],
don’t make excuses that the other person is too sensitive ... APOLOGIZE
And, in all matters, as you have occasion – EXTEND GRACE
To others when they have wronged you and to
yourself when you’ve missed the mark
During this
weekend of Thanksgiving … let’s also do some gracegiving
Praying that all your relationships,
interactions and gatherings will be grace-filled…
Have a Wonderful Evening and a Happy Thanksgiving!
