LOVE: IT IS NOT LIKE ...

Hi Friends!

Only two more days until Valentine’s Day!!!

Can you tell I am just a bit excited?

I love this time of year!

Actually, I love loving on people all the time – any excuse to get creative and do something nice: Buy a gift, cook a meal, bake a cake … you name … I’m all in!

AND, NOW – we continue our discussion on LOVE

YESTERDAY – we talked about how LOVE IS NOT LIKE LUST … AND LUST IS NOT LOVE

TODAY, we will be focusing on the second area of what love is not like –

SO – where do we begin in evaluating what love is not like?

WE START AND END RIGHT HERE … LOVE IS NOT ‘LIKE’

This is important because many people confuse ‘like’ with love

And others think that love is dependent upon ‘like’

So, let’s get the confusion part out of the way first since it is easiest to tackle

If someone says, ‘I like you’ – it is a pretty safe bet to take that at face value

The have communicated they like you – AND THAT IS ALL

If they have not even communicated that … be realistic!

When someone says ‘I love you’ – however – this is a different situation

It can often be taken more serious than ‘I like you’ –

However, there should still be some corresponding action

After all, some people will say anything:

To avoid hurting your feelings, to make you feel good or to get what they want

NOW – I am not one for playing games

I don’t play them with people and my expectation is that they not be played with me

Generally speaking – I say what I mean and I mean what I say

I do not believe in playing cat & mouse, hiding & chasing games.

THAT BEING SAID HOWEVER –

I still hold onto something my pastor has shared in the past: ‘The proof is in the pursuit’

UNDERSTAND THIS –

WHAT WE WANT – WE GO AFTER – WE PURSUE IT

When we want to spend time with someone;

Even if we cannot find an extra minute in our day under normal circumstances;

We will ‘find’ time to be with that individual.

Things and relationships which are a priority to us get prioritized in our lives

If we ‘like’ someone – we might not put forth the additional effort

But if we ‘love’ someone – we are like me with Valentine’s Day – WE ARE ALL IN!

We make a conscious decision and are intentional in ensuring 'talk' with a 'credible walk’

So, ‘LOVE is LOVE’ and ‘LIKE is LIKE’ and we must not get the two confused

This brings us to the second half of our discussion on ‘LOVE IS NOT LIKE…’

AND THIS IS IT ... LOVE IS NOT DEPENDENT UPON ‘LIKE’

I always found it so sweet when I would listen to my pastor talk about how he would get off work and then drive many miles just to spend a short time with the beautiful woman who is now his wife. His story of pursuit was not a situation based upon game-playing; it was a story of commitment and determination. He may not have ‘liked’ the tiredness, the long drive or the distance between them. But he ‘loved’ her and that took precedence. I believe he understood what I am hoping to convey today.

LOVE IS NOT LIKE and LOVE IS NOT DEPENDENT UPON ‘LIKE’

Once you are in a committed relationship [marriage or serious dating] –

It is important to understand that love is not like and it is not dependent upon it

We talked about love yesterday and how love is a choice and a resolve.

This is important because there will not always be romantic feelings

And during these times, it will be necessary to rely upon the unconditional & intentional aspect of love

Love is mature when ‘like’ does not get its way and wants to behave childishly

Love says ‘I’m sorry’ even when it feels it was wronged; 

     when it does not like how it was treated

Love stays when ‘like’ walks out the door.

Love gives even when ‘like’ has faded because it feels the other person is selfish

I may not ‘like’ what someone says or does but that does not determine my ‘love’ for them

I can ‘not like’ you [at the moment] and still ‘love’ you [with a lasting love]

LOVE IS NOT LIKE and LOVE IS NOT DEPENDENT UPON ‘LIKE’

The problem arises when LIKE is made to be equal with LOVE

This is when people start making decisions which have far-reaching consequences

·       I do not like my spouse [today]; therefore, I no longer have to honor the [everyday] love commitment that I made?

·       I do not like the way my mate looks; so I can allow my eyes to wander?

Absolutely Not – 

Love honors even when it does not like; ‘love’ stays focused when ‘like’ is waning or fleeting

In my book, When Storms Rage, when discussing the need to Count the Costs,

I discuss how Jesus set the perfect example for us;

     ‘for the joy set before Him, Christ endured the cross’ Hebrews 12:2

He possessed a ‘complete and proper perspective which enabled Him to endure…’

The love Jesus had for God and for humanity [for us] overrode the dislike of His situation

Yes – that is an extreme example. 

     Generally speaking, no one  is being asked to lay down their life.

But – you might be required to lay down your pride; 

     Which can be harder [for many of us] than dying.

LOVE IS GREATER THAN LIKE

So, never allow ‘like’ [or dislike] to stand in the way of how you respond in ‘love’

And, never forget LOVE IS NOT LIKE – AND LOVE IS NOT DEPENDENT UPON ‘LIKE’

Praying You Have a Blessed Evening!

Wishing You Much Love …